A Prayer for Humility

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. ~Philippians 2:3

As a newly married woman and instant step-mother (though we don't use that word at our house) to two children, I soon learned that prayer was my friend. I hadn't prayed much before I got married. Not in a focused kind of way at least. I didn't do it intentionally and I didn't do it often. If I did do it, I was usually asking for something. And that "something" probably wasn't very important.

But I pray now. I pray a lot. Intentionally and often. And I have found the glory in praying for others. Often those "others" are people I would have considered my enemies when I was living the paragraph above. I pray for my husband's ex-wife and I pray for guidance in dealing with her. I pray for people in Sunday School whom we've reached out to in many ways, and who now do not even speak to us on Sunday morning. I pray for help in honoring and loving my husband, and for wisdom in raising my sweet baby boy.

In the past few weeks, that sweet baby boy has begun saying "Me, me!" when he wants something. He wants often and he wants urgently. While driving home from daycare one day last week.... "me, me!" being chanted from the back seat... I began to ponder humility and its place both in and for my life.

I realize that, for a 14 month old, it is all about "me". However, I deal on a daily basis with someone much, much older who is very narcissistic. She sends flowers and the next day wonders (aloud....to all who will listen) why the person hasn't called to thank her. Honestly it wears me down after awhile. I hope that I am not like that.

So thus began my prayers for humility. I pray that part of my son's place in the world will be shining his light on others so that he will himself find joy. I pray that I do not turn the spotlight on myself so that I can seem smarter, better or more qualified than another. I pray for God's loving hands to guide me on a path that is helpful to someone other than myself, though it may not always be the easiest path. And I pray that when I do help others that the only person that needs to know about it is God, in his own way.

Our world is a world of immediate gratification... personal, material and at all costs. It is about excess, who's best, me first. Our children are made to compete in ways they should not, by people who do not know the real meaning of competition.

When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.

~Proverbs 11:2

Until next time,

For the Love of a Child

Doug's dad, Leon, has been visiting for a little over a week, and we've sure enjoyed having him with us! This is only the fourth time I've seen Leon, and the first time I've been able to spend so much time with him. I've really relished getting to know my father-in-law, and seeing my husband through someone else's eyes.

We've laughed and even shed a few reminescent tears this week. We've said "remember when" too many times to count. We've played numerous hands of UNO and Adam, the busy 1-year old, has had a willing target for all of his "let-me-hand-this-to-you, now-you-hand-it-back-to-me" escapades.

I thought I'd share one very touching story:

There are three kids in my husband's family: Darlene is the oldest. Next comes Cindy, and then Doug. Cindy and Doug are adopted. Originally Doug's parents thought they might not be able to have any children of their own and had begun the adoption process with Catholic Charities (CC). Part of the CC requirements was that a couple had to adopt two children, and Doug's parents agreed to that. Then, along came Darlene, so they said they were just interested in one more child, a boy. However, since they now had a child of their own, they were not eligible to adopt at all through Catholic Charities.

Some time passed, and they found an attorney in Dallas, TX who handled private adoptions. They told him they would like a boy. And then they waited.... One day Doug's mom received a call from the attorney that a newborn was available, but it was a girl. Of course she could not contain her excitement and convinced Doug's dad that it didn't matter that it wasn't a boy. They immediately drove to Dallas from their home in Houston and were united with Cindy.

A little more time passed and they still wanted a boy, so they called the same attorney. He happened to be working on a case and said he and his wife were also wanting to adopt, but they wanted a girl. So, if the baby was a girl, they would take it. But if it was a boy, Doug's parents could have the baby. And....it was a boy....my husband.

Adoptions in Texas at the time did not become legal until 6 months after the baby was placed with the adoptive parents. The same judge handled the legal proceedings for both Cindy's and Doug's adoptions. He happened to also be the judge the presided over the Jack Ruby murder trial in Dallas.

With tears in his eyes, my father-in-law concluded by telling us that, at the end of the court proceeding to finalize Doug's adoption, little Cindy reached out in the judge's direction at the front of the courtroom. Not knowing exactly what she wanted, Leon walked with her towards the judge. She shyly placed a kiss on the judge's cheek. She wanted to thank him for the gift of her baby brother.

My husband gave an elequont eulogy at his mother's funeral two years ago. In it, he mentioned taking the call of a family acquaintence at the house after his mother passed away. She said, "You're their adopted boy." And my husband's words at the funeral were... Yes, he was adopted. But his parents never made him feel anything but made from their hearts.

What a wonderful gift Doug's parents gave so many....even a girl from Iowa who, years later, would thank God for that baby boy adopted in Dallas in 1962.

For the love of a child....who is now my husband.