Happy 81st Birthday, Mom

~ My mom's high school graduation photo, Spring 1944 ~

She's lived through the Great Depression and five wars.

She was a "working girl" for 56 years.

She raised three children over the course of 38 years. She had a son in college and a daughter in kindergarten in 1973.
We all graduated from college, and I think she would say it's a small miracle her daughter has a diploma to hang on her wall. It was touch-and-go more than once.
She has eight grandchildren. The oldest is 29 and the youngest is 2.

She was my role-model as a working mom, and she was a single parent for most of my formative years. She worked hard and she worked every day. She had a full-time job and two home-based part-time jobs. We never lacked for anything.

I always knew she did the best she could, and it was always more than enough for me.
I stayed out of trouble not because of what I thought might happen to me, but because I didn't want to do anything that would dishonor her.
Her first choice in discipline was the look and a firm, "Because I said so". If that didn't work, then she got out THE STICK. There was no need for a third option.
A family friend used to say, "Your mother has an opinion about almost every thing, and she's almost always right, too." I usually didn't appreciate that when I was growing up, but I sure do appreciate it now!
She was always fashionable and pretty. She wore Estee Lauder makeup, black suede boots with high heels, and Clinique Aeromatics Elixir.
One day when she was about 75 she called me on the phone and said, "I think I've finally gotten a wrinkle".

She's still active and busy and sharp and witty! We email almost daily. (And, she even gets her nails done a couple times a month!)

Oh, how I miss her.... I wish I lived close enough so I could stop over for coffee on Saturday mornings and take little Adam with me so he could sit on her lap and give her a hug.
Once when I was 7 my dad forgot to pick me up from Sunday School and I had to walk home on a cold winter's day. I was crying and she wrapped me in a blanket, gave me a pack of M&Ms and held me on her lap and we had a good talk. I pretended I was cold long after I'd really warmed up because I wished I could sit on her lap forever.
Today I'd bring her an angel food cake and a vase filled with roses for her special day. I'd kiss her on her cheek and then take her out to lunch.
She's been my closest and most cherished sidekick longer than anyone else in my life.
I couldn't possibly ask for a better mother.

And I couldn't possibly love her more.

Gone Crazy. Back Soon.

I'm always swamped at work - covered up with paper, phone calls, orders, invoices, elevation drawings...and the occasional misplaced paint brush, box cutter or latex glove.

I didn't set out to be a designer or a manager of people who gild frames or a person who "does the financials". But that's what I do. I wear a lot of hats and juggle lots of projects, people, deadlines and personalities.

Lately I've been pondering my work styles and methods - mostly wondering how I can be more efficient and not end up so frazzled at the end of the day. You know it's bad when you have to use a one hour commute in heavy traffic to pull yourself together before you pick up a toddler.

One of the things that was indispensable to me back in my corporate days working as an HR Director was my "notebook". It was neatly filled with notes (evenly spaced with date and time) on every phone call I made/received and every conversation I had relating to work. Thus, when a disgruntled employee accused me of something, I could say, "But on April 29 at 1:36pm I told you XYZ and you said ABC."

But there's something about a little age and a few children that can wrangle the brain a bit sometimes.

For example, today as I was riffling through papers I looked at notes I'd take at a meeting and they looked like this:

Jessica:Stuff Heat???
112,000 / Framing
Maintenance man
992
Dabney/Ricardo hotel
#510 – 36 x 31/ ask Mary? (fax D)
456-02 Isle Blue

And it's not even secret code. I'm still trying to decipher most of it.

I've got to go sit in rush hour traffic now so I can unwind.

Pondering Cookie Monster

The other day I was reading one of Adam's favorite Sesame Street books to him - the one about Cookie Monster sharing his cookies with Elmo and Zoe.

When we finished I asked Adam, "So what about Cookie Monster? What color is he?"

"Blue!", he said.

"And, what does Cookie Monster like to eat?"

"No! No, mama!" Adam insisted. "Ad-ma say what about Cookie."

"OK, Adam. You tell Mommy about Cookie Monster."

"Cookie have no nose and no tun (tongue). And Zoe have pink nose and tun like a heart."

I guess it's just a minor detail that Cookie Monster must have a hard time tasting or smelling those cookies.

To think I've been so woefully unobservant about the Sesame Street clan all these years.

Let It Snow!

At Christmastime we had to modify "sledding" here in Georgia and make do without the snow.

But...It's snowed twice this week and we're enjoying a comfy-cozy day inside watching the snowflakes (and the temps!) drop.

I do have to say the Midwest girl in me loves this unusual visit by the Snow Man. Hope you all are staying warm and cozy this weekend, too!

Tell Me Something I Don't Already Know

I've been a little absent in the blogging world this week. The reason, you see, is the only thing I really feel like doing is laying on the sofa, turning on my heating pad, piling on a warm blanket and watching a marathon of The Housewives of Orange County or some other crap TV. I guess if I had a stash of chocolate donuts or peanut M&Ms that would make it all the better.

What I have actually been doing is going to work, cooking, doing laundry, loading the dishwasher, giving baths, wiping noses, hugging and kissing and buying groceries....

...and juggling all the other things a wife/mom/full-time working gal does on a daily basis.

But I'd rather be on the sofa.

All that to say I've finally come to realize that turning 40 really does come with some unexpected changes - moodiness, feeling a little bit blue at certain times of the month, feeling overwhelmed more so than usual...that kind of thing. At least for me.

Being a fairly level-headed gal, I also factored in things like giving birth at age 38 (and gaining 50 pounds to boot), working full-time while also caring for a family with three young children, and not exercising like I know I should. I'm nothing if not realistic about the life that's chosen me and how I choose to live it.

So, last year I tried a new doctor when it was time for the annual exam we all know and love. He was "holistic" and came recommended by two people I know and trust.

And "holistic" he was - right down to his Birkenstocks and long gray ponytail. As I sat in his office waiting for him, I perused the titles on his bookshelf:

Healing the Organic Way
Take Time to Feel the Om
Getting to Know Your Spirit

He was a nice man. He spent over an hour talking to me. He asked good questions. He suggested blood tests for various hormone levels which, in the end, showed nothing out of the ordinary.

And then he did it. As God is my witness the man pulled out a chart of the female reproductive organs - a write-on/wipe-off chart. Then he pulled out his marker. And I sat there in stunned silence. I am sure my face was saying, Are you really going to do what I think?

And the answer, my friends, was yes. He proceeded to give me a lesson on all the female parts, while drawing arrows and circles and stars. I felt like I was in 6th grade, giggling behind my hand when the teacher said the word "ovaries".

He told me all about ovulation, and about what happens during pregnancy and delivery.

And the whole time all I could muster was, uh-huh, uh-huh....

Are you kidding me? Telling me about ovulation and giving birth is like telling Julia Child what a measuring cup is for. It's like leading Meryl Streep onto a stage and saying, This is how you act.

Ummmm.. been there, done that, got the epidural. Thank you.

What I wanted from this guy was some kind of miracle herb that would make me lose weight without trying and make me feel as happy as a six-year old at Disney. I wanted peace, love and all things good - and even organic if it meant I'd look and feel more like I did when I was 25.

Or something less elementary at the very least. A prescription of sofa-rest and a chocolate IV perhaps.

But what I got was a dadgum lesson on the female parts and plumbing.

Which reminds me of the time many years ago I was playing Pictionary with my mom and a few high school friends. I drew the Golden Arches for the word "restaurant". My mom was attempting to guess what "place" I was drawing... keyword being "place". And suddenly, in a fit of excitement, she shouted "fallopian tubes!"

When you are in high school and your mother yells "fallopian tubes!" in front of your friends for any reason, the needle on the embarrassment machine goes off the chart.

So, anyway.... holistic didn't seem to be a HOLE LOT of help to me.

As evidenced by the fact that, nearly a year later, I still prefer chocolate and the sofa over a 5-mile run and a plate of tofu.

But, mark my word, I know what my ovaries are for.

I Wanna Be Like My Mic(rowave)

How is it that my dishwasher automatically knows when to engage "scour" mode, my microwave automatically knows what size popcorn bag is popping, and my computer knows so much it has me baffled daily? .....

...While I can't remember my grocery list, can't find my car keys, Adam's hat, an umbrella or a clean sippy cup?

Maybe I need to check into Microsoft University or Kenmore Center for Reconstructive and Plastic Surgery.

These appliances are killing me.

Geography: 2-Year Old Style

A couple nights ago I heard my husband talking to Adam in the other room:

Doug: Where does Grandma Eva live?

Adam: Eye-wa (Iowa)

Doug: And where does Grandfather live?

Adam: Ok-homa (Oklahoma)

Doug: Where does Aunt Darlene live?

Adam: Teth-ath (Texas)

Doug: And where does Adam live?

Adam: Curious Georgia!

Our Anniversary Dinner

Doug and I don't go out on date nights very much - certainly not as much as we should. But we always make a point of going out for our anniversary, which happens to be on New Year's Eve.

This year we decided to go out the Saturday prior to NYE so we could avoid the crowds and all the crazy people on the roads. We like a good time as much as the next guy, but we also like to make it home in one piece so we can get out of those uncomfortable dress-up clothes and flop into bed.

BUT! As the old saying goes, the best laid plans rarely seem to work out when you have kids often go awry.

Our awry-ness started the evening before our date night. I thought Adam felt a little warm when he woke up from his nap. He'd also had a cough for a day or so. The mommy instinct threw up a big red flag in my head. Oh, if only I would have heeded that red flag. Instead, I went to the grocery store with Adam in tow and he threw up in the chips and snack aisle. And let me just say right here, the only aisle busier than the chip and snack aisle two days before NYE is the beer aisle.

So, we had a large audience for all the barfing drama on Aisle 7.

It was a very memorable event, in many ways. For days upon days, Adam would talk only of this unfortunate event: I frowed up by da chips wiff my Mommy.

We spent a restless night with a feverish little boy and so I took him to Urgent Care the next day. They proclaimed it a little virus - nothing could be done for it - and gave him a prescription for his cough. Story of my life at Urgent Care - nothing ever can be done for it.

All that to say, we decided to spare our babysitter the agony of the germs and the fever and the coughing and rescheduled our anniversary dinner date for last Saturday night.

We got all dressed up with some place to go!

We were half an hour early and got to enjoy a martini (3 olives!)and some homemade potato chips at the bar.

No sooner were we seated in our favorite booth, than two complimentary glasses of champagne appeared and our dinner began.

Shrimp cocktail.
Spinach salad with warm bacon dressing.
Red wine.
The best steak in Atlanta.
Chocolate mint cookies with homemade ice cream.

Honey, I'm sorry... Victoria's Secret will be closed by the time we're done.

That's OK. This dessert is going straight to my hips anyway.

Ahhhh. That's better. A real camera. Here's to many more great years together. Even if they do go awry, we'll still have each other. XOXO

*&%*!@!

Conversation with the car repair place:

Me: Hello. I am wondering why the brake light in my car is still on after I spent
more than a good Coach bag costsseveral hundred dollars gettig the brakes fixed yesterday.

Car Man: I'm not sure since I have not personally seen your car. You'd have to bring it in.

Me: But I just had it in there yesterday.

Car Man: I realize that, but I can't help you without seeing your car.

Me: But the whole reason you fixed my brakes is because the brake light was on. So it's possible the brakes aren't fixed because the light is still on. Last time I brought my car in you charged me for an alignment and then told me my car was not able to be aligned because of a faulty tire. This time you charged me to fix my brakes but the light is still on.

Car Man: I'd be happy to take a look at that if you bring your car in.

Me: Realizing this is where obsecurity meets bad service meets no-win-situation. Let me just call you back another time
before I rip your ever lovin' head off and you wished you had a brake light of your own.

I also endured a bad chomp job on my bangs at the hairdresser last week.

I guess next time I need a haircut or my car serviced I'll just stand on a bridge and throw cash over the side.

But I'll only jump if everybody else is doing it.

At Least He Has Good Table Manners

Yesterday my husband left the house early, before Adam and I were awake, to have breakfast with a friend.

When Adam woke up, he asked where his daddy was.

"He's having breakfast with his friend, Mr. Adkins."

And, because lately we've been in the midst of teaching Adam how to say hello to someone, make eye contact, and even shake hands (you can never start too early)... I continued:

"If you were to meet Mr. Adkins you would say, Good morning, Mr. Adkins. It's nice to see you."

"NO! NO!" Adam exclaimed. "Adma say, Mr. Napkin. Wipe oss 'yo face!"

Resolutions

I love the coming of the New Year. The last part of December hosts the three most precious events in my life: my son's birthday, The Son's birthday, and then our wedding anniversary.

So, by the time January 1 rolls around, I've celebrated to the utmost and I'm ready to regroup, realign, and set my sights on the year ahead (after reflecting for a bit - but not too long - on the year past).

I love New Year's Resolutions. I actually love resolutions at any time of year (because really every day can be a fresh start) but there's something about the beginning of a year that is a little more ripe for the pickin'.

I've enjoyed reading many of your resolutions the past few days. Whatever you've chosen to accomplish, count me amongst your cheerleaders! And do keep us posted on how you're doing. I love hearing progress reports. So, with that in mind, I thought I'd go ahead and share some of mine - some being the operative word because I am sure you're not interested in the fact that I've resolved to floss every. single. day and drink more water (blah and double-blah).

My most steadfast work this year will be in Faith and Outreach. I decided to split the year into four 3-month sessions since I have so many areas I feel God is leading me toward. And, every other resolution I have is based on how I apply myself in faith and prayer.

Now through March 31 I'll be focusing on Marriage and Family. I desperately want to serve my husband more and be a better helpmate, while also setting aside the bulldog in me by allowing my husband to serve and help me more. That's one thing he asks from me over and over and I will be working on it with passion. I always keep a copy of The Power of a Praying Wife in the seat beside me in the car. It's amazing how reading nearly any page at random is a blessing and a lesson. I will be praying specific and focused prayers for my husband, more so than I've ever done before, and I hope you all will consider praying more for your spouses this year, too. If you do nothing else, consider doing this. My Bible Study for these first three months is Praying Through the Deeper Issues of Marriage by Stormie Omartian.

I've also been picking up note cards and writing paper in the sale bins at my favorite stationery stores. This year I'll be sending at least one hand-written note every week. Think how much you love to get a little something special in the mailbox... I know I do. There are many, many people in my life who might need a word of encouragement, a thank you, or a note "just because".

I've also started a daily diary for Adam, written in my own hand in a nice leather-bound journal. I'll add in pictures and anything else that strikes me as memorable on any given day. And, with a two-year old, it's not hard to find things to record.

In the Financial category I'd love to teach myself more about investing and put that knowledge to work. I don't have any debt, other than our house, so it's prime time to make money on the money we have, save more, and spend less.

I'm also going to make a donation every month to a charity I've not donated to before. The donation could be monetary, a specific item, or service of my time. This will open my eyes to the many, many needs of others. I can't wait to see what organizations I find and people I meet along the way. This month I'm donating to Camp Sunshine.

There you have it - a little glimpse of my resolutions for 2008.

Now if I could only get those Christmas decorations put away...

His & Hers New Year

HER NEW YEAR'S DAY LIST

* do laundry

* clean kitchen

* misc. shopping and errands for back to work and school

* pack bags and get things organized for back to work and school tomorrow

* cook some things ahead for the rest of the week

* write thank-you notes

* organize Christmas cards received and update addresses

* take down Christmas decorations

* pick up toys for the 875th time

HIS NEW YEAR'S DAY LIST

* Outback Bowl 11am

* Cotton Bowl 11:30am

* Capital One Bowl 1:00pm

* Gator Bowl 1:00pm

* Rose Bowl 4:30pm

* Sugar Bowl 8:30pm

I'm just sayin'.....

Happy New Year!