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If there was any place I needed to be last Sunday, it was in church. I desperately needed an attitude adjustment. I was coming off a hectic week at work, and I guess maybe the full moon had pulled my hormone wave pool a little off course. (I don't even know if there was a full moon, but let's just go with it).
Taking a shower and blow drying my hair, an obvious necessity, seemed almost unbearable. My hair has a life of its own and takes FOREVER to dry. I flipped the light on in my closet and it popped and went out. Besides the fact I couldn't see anything in there, I couldn't find anything to wear that fit right or looked right. The blow drying frenzy had left me hot and sweaty and I was not a happy girl.
By the time we left for church at 9:40 I'd been up nearly four hours. I was not mad at my husband for anything in particular, but of course I lashed out at him.
"I'm just so frazzled", I growled. "Every single day is rush, rush, rush. I've been up since 5:30!"
Then for some reason as we were backing out of the garage he pushed the button to close my side of the garage as well as the button for the other door, which opened that side. It hasn't been working well for awhile, so that involved him re-opening my door, going inside the garage to close the ailing door, then getting back in the car to close my door with the remote.
Grrrr... "And why haven't you gotten that garage door fixed?" (You knew I was going to say it, didn't you!)
So there we were at church. Happy Couple of the Year. Perfect Mom, dressed all cute. Accessorized beautifully. Glowing! Fresh! Together!
Yeah. Right.
"Praise God from whom all blessings flow."
If I have to tell you one more time about that garage door, I'm just going to call someone to fix it and it will cost us $100 or more.
"Good Morning. It's so nice to see you. Are you ready for the new school year?"
If I have to load and unload that dishwasher one more time this weekend, I swear I am going to explode.
Have you ever been there? Sitting in church praising the Lord outwardly, and inwardly reeling with negativity? Oh! The hypocrisy of it all. I'm guilty, oh yes I am. And I know other people are, too. We're all human.
I got over it. By the end of the day I was feeling much better. My husband knows to just let me have some space so I can wallow in my misery.
Oh.... The garage door?
Don't ask. I've let it go.
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28 comments:
Hi Jill, You sound like the kind of day I had yesterday....I was upset about the way my PT is going from my knee surgery.I was down and took it out on my husband and mom.Why do we have days like this????? Baba
I have Sunday mornings like that all the time, and I can't stand myself on those days.
Thanks for sharing your open heart. You are so real and that's why I enjoy knowing you.
Let's hope this weekend is smoother - for both of us. I'm thinking it will be as soon as I make your oreo cupcakes!
Oh Jill - what a heartfelt post - and yes, I've been there - and I hate it when I am.
Something like that calls for a cupcake!
Oh, yes! I know just what you mean, but when we are all going through our own "stuff", church is exactly where we need to be. I think we can all identify with trying to keep it all together, but things at home are not always all together.
Great reminder! And I know God understands all of that too.
Rhoda
I agree with Rhonda....it the midst of those times Church is the very place we need to be....helps us get things back into perspective.
Susan
You know everyone if honest has been where you were during church. I know I have. But God is good and his peace has a way of getting into us and healing us.
I can relate to your thoughts! Thanks for being honest. :) Hope you have a great Sunday morning tomorrow...
We've all had those mornings... yours sounds familiar. Makes you wonder what all the people you encounter day to day have dealt with or are dealing with behind the facade of perfection.
I hope tomorrow is a smoother Sunday for you Jill.
I so know that type of day! Especially on Sundays. I'm all yelling at the kids to hurry up, why haven't you brushed your teeth/hair. Husband, why haven't you done this or that, why do I have to ASK you to put on little one's shoes? Then we walk through the door and we are all happy like. We hold hands, when we probably haven't held hands all week! BUT, in the end, our time there brings us back to center, together, and we usually come out the doors in a much better mood then when we went in!
Absolutely, I've been there! More than once and I don't like myself at all. Thanks for your honesty. I hope tomorrow is better for you. And from a wife who is missing her husband, be thankful yours is there to go to church with you.
I have been there so many times, especially on Sunday mornings. I used to throw in the towel and say "Screw it! I am not going to church with this attitude", but then my day just got worse and worse. Now if I force myself to go to church, I notice my day turns out better than I could have imagined. It's amazing how God works like that.
Jill,
I was thinking similar thoughts this morning and just posted about it actually--please stop over if you get a chance.
Oh my beautiful friend, we have all been there and your honesty is so refreshing.
Praying today was a better Sonday for you.
Hugs, Lyndy
I came to your blog via MyMontana Moments. Oh yes I can totally identify with this! There is so much rush every day and any extra dramas cause stress, and when do they all seem to happen? When I'm already busy. Thanks for sharing. Annie (on my links) shared about her crazy day on Thursday or Friday. I've been struggling to fit it all in, Mum to 2 children aged 6 and 4, working part time (self employed), keeping up with my exercise and diet routine, housework, life, friends...aahhh. Yes so understand.
Been there girlfriend, I think we all have! I just love this post, very transparent and something we could all relate too.
hang in there, my friend!
and...that d___ woman over at "workinthatpreppy" won't send me my "!&%^&" bags that were supposed to be here two weeks ago! But guess what the good news is? I am not charging you for either one...PROMISE they will be to you by end of this week
I hate those days. It doesn't seem to matter how early you wake up some mornings as it is never enough time to get ready and everything else done.
Been there done that, I think everyone who goes to church has experienced times like that.
BTW, I nominated you for an award! Check out my blog for info.
www.beaufortlookout.blogspot.com
Hugs to you!
Jenn
I can SO relate! Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Melissa
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I have been there...I was even really mad at my husband one Sunday morning and purposely didn't sit close to him! LOL
I once heard that the enemy loves to take advantage of stress getting ready for church...because of course the enemy doesn't like us going to church at all!
The amazing thing is that even when we paint on that "happy, together face" God sees right through it anyway...we can't hide anything from Him!
I love your honesty...thank you for being open! I know most of us can completely relate!
God Bless you Jill! I've been there many days myself.
Have a wonderful week.
Blessings,
Sandy :)
Oh Sister! I have SO BEEN THERE! And it's an awful feeling, isn't it???? I hope that things are better now.
Hugs.
:-) Susan
You just described several of my Sunday mornings. I really have to work on not getting so angry then. I usually have to end up apologizing to my hubby in the car on the way. That's definitely a continuing struggle.
"Been there. Done that. No t-shirt needed". Yep, you'e not alone.
Hugs!
Kat
I know those days all too well. Sometimes you just need a good wallow.
Glad you're feeling better!
My 2-year-old woke me up at 5 this morning...her diaper had leaked. My husband and 5-year-old got up at 7. I was trying to get the girls dressed and out the door and my husband walks through the kitchen and asks if I am "OK" as I wolf down a granola bar.
Uh...NO!
You are not alone. ;)
LOL! I have done that before and I love how the Lord always turns our attention back to Him! Life is so hectic...even for us stay at home moms. I have no idea how you do it everyday. I would be a basket case!
Yes, I have been there. Yes, I know the feeling. Even though the feelings are identified, it's not easy to snap out of it sometimes. I just praise God that He is patient, loving, and forgiving! =)
~ Leah
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