All the Oooky Stuff In One Fell Swoop

3.11.2008

Any of you that have children, know children, or were a child (that should cover everyone, right?) know that their little worlds are not always sunshine and roses. Nor are their minds.

Take my two year old son, for instance.

From the get-go, we have always been very upfront about the correct term for body parts. Okay, except I say hiney or bottom. Because really, who wants their child saying gleuteus maximus?

And, oh my goodness, those body parts become the topic of conversation very early on, don't they?

So.... a few weeks ago Adam's regular Sunday School teacher had the flu. He went to the class next door that just so happens to be taught by the Senior Pastor's wife. When we picked up, she told us what a good boy Adam had been (thank you, Lord!) And when she asked Adam who loves him, he sweetly turned his face up toward her and said, "Jesus does."

And then, we were not two steps out of the doorway when he asked me, "Hey Mom! Jesus have a pen*s?"

To which I lovingly responded without missing a beat, "I have no idea, son."

In addition to body part names, we've also taught Adam left and right. He knows which shoes go on which feet. He knows we take a left, a right, a right, a left and then a right when we drive to our house from his school.

Yesterday morning I was having a little snuggle with Adam. The clock said it was 6:30, but my body was saying it was only 5:30. Darn that daylight savings time. It may save daylight but think of all the things it doesn't save.

Sleep and sanity for example.

So, anyway, there I was, half asleep. Adam was contentedly drinking juice from his sippy cup.

Suddenly:

"Hey mom. I has a prod-lem wiff my nose."

"What's the problem?

I has a booger in my left nostril.

Go get a Kleenex.

No!

Then I guess you and your nostril will just have to suffer.

Okay!

And, since we're on the topic of body parts, I thought I'd let you know that I had a little "cosmetic scraping" done on my back and upper chest yesterday. Those years in the sun are beginning to rear their ugly head.

This was purely voluntary, I might add....but doesn't just reading the words "cosmetic scraping" give you the willies?

Cosmetic scraping.
Cosmetic scraping.

And then, to round it all out, I have my very first mammogram tomorrow morning. Oh my goodness. I'd rather go to the dentist.

Cosmetic scraping.

And so there you have it. All the ooky stuff in one-fell-swoop.

My life really is this exciting.

P.S.-- I wonder what Google search will lead some poor soul to this post.

13 comments:

Amber Kay :

I googled "cosmetic scraping", because well...I didn't know what it was. Guess who's link came up first?

Sandra :

Well I'm with amber, Ihad no idea what cosmetic scraping was so I googled it LOL

Good luck with the mammogram, Ouch!

Lauren@Baseballs&Bows :

I love the Jesus question!

annie :

He's so smart!!!
Amanda (oldest daughter) had to tell everyone (and I mean everyone) that her new little brother came equipped with a tail. Then she proceeded to ask everyone if they had a tail, including my father. UGH!!!

Just Mom :

BAH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....

Nadine :

The Jesus question made me laugh out loud.

Susan :

You are so funny!!!!
Susan

Tonja :

Cosmetic scraping...Yuck! It sounds horrible...but it could not be as bad as the dentist!

Cute little Adam...I am so glad you are able to record all these cute things in your blog. When you are older it will bring you many laughs!

I bet Jesus got a laugh out of that one, too!

Sonya :

The phrase cosmetic scraping does kinda give me the willies! Whoa nellie! I've never heard of that procedure.

BTW, thank you for your kind words on the passing of my BIL. I really appreciate your thoughts.

Dianne :

Jill, your son is just adorable in word, thought and pictures! It's cool that you seem to treasure him like you do.

You made me giggle when you said, "My life really is this exciting." HA! I love it!

Angi :

Ewww! I have no idea what cosmetic scraping really is - but I had a microderm abrasion on my face and I HATED it! I had a panic attack (which I've never had)and could not wait for it to end. HORRIBLE!!!! No more scraping of my body - dispite the sun damage I have!

Staci :

I am laughing out loud! This was great!!

Melissa in Mel's World :

Jill...I don't whether to laugh with you or say, "oh poor baby".

First off...I LOVE it when 2's just speak their mind, and boy do they have a mind of their own.

Second...never heard of cosmetic scraping, but living in Ft. Lauderdale I bet that happens a whole lot down here!!!

Have fun with the mammo...you'll never forget that experience! (I've had 3 and I am only 36, what's up with that?)

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